Procrastination

I have put off writing this month until the very last. I’ve had some great ideas but I didn’t put them on the computer right away so I’ve forgotten what they were. That tells me I’m having trouble incorporating them into my life.
I have animals. I love having animals and I learn so much from them. I think one of the reasons many people find animals so fascinating is animals know how to enjoy life. There are no animals that spend their time worrying about things that have never happened. If an animal is a worrier it is because they are use to living in an unstable environment.
I love watching baby animals. I especially love watching Mommy animals with their babies. I often see a Mother animal resting while several of their babies are crawling around on them or biting them or jumping on them. The Mother animal usually acts as if nothing is happening. There are very few human animals that act the same except on TV or in the movies. Baby animals retain their curiousity about the world. Humans tend to form opinions and retain them for the majority of their lives. I’m not sure this was always true. I think, when we lived closer to the land, humans were more adaptable, more willing to learn from their environment and change their assumptions based on new information.
How many people have made the connection that, when we criticize or judge people unfairly, it is often because we are uncomfortable with something we think we know about them. If we bother to really listen and get to know others, we find they are very similar to ourselves. For instance, I’m watching a movie about a woman who hated one of her classmates because she thought the classmate was so priveledged and untouchable. She meets her now many years later and finds the woman has become a top class hooker. They’ve just discovered they spent a lot of years envying each other for no reason.
I wonder if this envy is why we spend a vast majority of our lives trying to live up to some intangible, unattainable version of ourselves that we think other people will like. I wish the whole world could find the good within themselves and  become their best self. If we invested love and understanding into oursleves, I believe we would lessen or quit judging others. I think our judgement of ourselves comes from others judging us and us internalizing that judgement. We are young and don’t realize the judgement has nothing to do with us. If we ever do realize the judgement has nothing to do with us, do we take the next step and begin talking to ourselves nicely and loving ourselves? Do we figure out what we want in life instead of what we’ve always been told we want? Do we step outside of the conventions with which we grew up? Do we take the plunge and willingly step into ourselves? Probably not. There are possible consequences to change. Others might judge us, quit being our friend, get angry with us. It is difficult to face the things others might do to us and still love ourselves and move forward with our new lives. Thankfully, what I’ve found is, usually, we find people who let us know how much they admire our initiative and willingness to be ourselves. Yes, old friends may fall away but, truthfully, they were never friends. They need us to stay the same so they feel comfortable in their lives. Their falling away has nothing to do with us and everything to do with their fear of their power and unwillingness to step into it.
I know beyond any shadow of a doubt that, if everyone in the world stepped into their power over themselves & a deep love of themselves, they would find themselves to be invincible. Being alive is an incredible honor. Too many of us have given up the honor in order to fit into a very limited view of who we can be. I wish love to the world and each person in it. I understand the fear. I hope more people will join me in stepping into their power and their ability.